A fun certificate to let somebody know that there is a slight problem, just a tiny hint to listen more than tlak; maybe knowing the subject talked about a little better. Ideally among friends and relatives. When framed in an A3 frame and hanging on the wall it is a beautiful and colorful reminder to create a better habit. 

We are pleased to present you with your DOCTORATE IN 
TALKALOTOLOGY which entitles you to hold forth at great length 
on subjects which you know absolutely nothing about. 

Your babbling now reaches a much greater level of inanity 
and gives you the envied status of a Blethering Blatherskite. 

You are qualified in news-mongering, tattle-telling, tale-bearing, 
gabbling, gum-bashing, prattle-rattling and other forms of persiflage. 
Gossip and scandal are grist for your mill in your role of Bush-Telegraph. 
You are the jungle drum that sends rumours to the far comers of our ears. 

So, go like the clappers my dear chatterbox and indulge in your favourite 
Clish-maclaver, Gobbledygook, cobblers and codswallop. 
Confuse the uninitiated with fiddlefaddle and claptrap; 
bemuse with balderdash and bunkum; dazzle with 
tommyrot and twaddle for you are now an 
expert in baloney and bosh. 

Congratulations in gaining a Doctorate in this delightful Hogwash.
Waitl Don't tell me you are SPEECHLESS.